The decision "leave Cirque du Soleil"

KURIOS, The show I was performing in, was a touring show. The show venue moved almost every two months.

The schedule of the week was basically the same in every city. From Tuesday to Sunday, there were about 10 shows.

Every Monday is a day off. But I tried to focus on recover my tired condition and didn't use much time for sight seeing or something.

"Keep the condition to perform not to be ashamed under the name Cirque du Soleil".

It was a top priority for me, the person experienced having been away from the show because of the sickness once.

Good quality sleep with special pillow and mattress brought from Japan, and 1 hour stretch before show every day.

If I felt a strange feeling in my body even a little, I asked to the medical team immediately. I paid my attention for the physical condition management with full power.

In addition, I was needed to maintain Yo-Yos and make-up before the show. I started to feel that I can practice to keep my skill, however, it's difficult for me to have much time to get new tricks or create new act in this schedule.

Until then, I could been growing at a good pace towards my dream of "Cirque du Soleil". But when my dream came true and began appearance, I noticed that my growth speed had became slower.

I felt a impatience.

In my contract, the discretion of renewal or not is on the artist side. That means I could continue to be with Cirque permanently if I desired.

But it sounded like "As a performer, the current level is the peak of my life. I will never grow in future life".

Of course it's not same for otehr artists. Many of them are growing with continue performing in Cirque. But in my case, I felt like above.

Even though the possibility I can help not only Yo-Yo community but also many more people had appeard with me after TED, it seems to be difficult to continue with performing in Cirque.

I wonder I will be able to feel worth living or not if it's difficult to expect big growth as a performer and less expand of the life.

Even at that time, I had received a lot of voices like "I am encouraged by your passion, came running to Cirque du Soleil with the Yo-yo" and I was really happy.

But I thought, maybe I can encourage more people.

What I really have to do is not to retain stable income but pursue the possibility of help more people, isn't it?

Wasn't it my worth living?

I, the person accomplished the dream "to perform in Cirque du Soleil with the Yo-Yo", finished the contract in only two years and I returned to Japan in February 2016.